So I was stalking other peoples blogs on Twitter #noshame. And came across a lovely girls blog (which I bloody forgot the link to so I can't share) and she spoke about her OCD struggles. Now I also struggle with a form of OCD and could so empathize with the way she was feeling. When most people think of OCD (Obsessive compulsive disorder) they think of someone obsessed with being clean eg. washing their hands, but there is a lot more to it. Without cheating on Google for a description, I would say OCD is a pattern of behavior a person has to do to prevent something bad happening.
Everyone's compulsive thoughts are different. Some are more extreme than others. I'm sure you may have heard of lots of "bizarre" things people do. Like knocking on door 5 times before you enter, or washing your hands every time you touch something. Most people think it's ridiculous, and can't understand why people make a conscious decision to do the weirdest things. I think if you haven't dealt with OCD yourself you wont understand completely and that's fine.
So you're probably wondering that weird thing I do? Well if you think back to the last paragraph, I personally described OCD as a prevention to stop something bad happening. I am scared all the time of causing something bad to happen because of me. My main issue is plugs and appliances. This sounds embarrassing but I have to take photo's of my hair straighteners and plugs before I leave the house. OK that's not too extreme I guess, a lot of people get scared they've left something on. But if I'm having a bad day, I will panic about every little thing that could cause a problem because of me. Sometimes I have to check the taps, tv's, kettle and doors. I've even drove back home after checking everything 3 times to double check another time.
If I don't check all of this, I convince myself the worst is going to happen. For example I worry that I'll cause a fire - stupid right? I actually can see how silly my thoughts are, and try to trick myself that it's all ok. I have spoke on my blog regarding anxiety - Anxiety and OCD are definitely linked. The more anxious I am, the worse my OCD is.
Do you guys suffer from OCD, or know someone that does?
Love Laura x